Hocus Pocus

Here's a little article I wrote for my university's paper for a 90s nostalgia column, about Hocus Pocus.

It’s Just A Bunch Of Hocus Pocus

      Werewolves. Witches. Hobgoblins. All creatures that anyone inclined toward the supernatural learn to look out for as we creep closer to All Hallows’ Eve. But 20 years ago, a movie gave us something else to be afraid of when the full moon looms overhead: Virgins with lighters. 

     That’s right: Hocus Pocus was released two decades ago, and we’re all getting old. A feeling Winifred Sanderson and her sisters can sympathize with, seeing as they went through all the trouble of collecting dead men’s toes and biting off pieces of their own tongues to conjure a literally life-sucking potion. 

     Yet even child homicide doesn’t prevent Winnie, Mary, and Sarah from being the most beloved witches in pop culture (give or take a Sabrina). And can we be blamed for loving them so? Bette Midler’s over-the-top campy goodness as Winifred can only—just maybe--be matched by Jessica Lange’s work on American Horror Story. Then you have Sarah Jessica Parker’s sultry idiot Sarah with her inability to see a boy without throwing her hands on her chest, and Kathy Najimy’s dumb-yet-dutiful Mary, riding a vacuum cleaner and being inexplicably and hilariously part dog. Of course I could spend days talking of the glories of the Sandersons, but let’s get back to that virgin with the zippo. 

      Max Dennison’s California, laid-back, tied-dyed point of view is apparently “keep it in your pants until Allison and her Yabos put out” and everyone makes sure we remember it. Seriously, take a drink every time someone says “virgin” with a strange hint of disgust and you’ll be drunk before you can say “I Put A Spell On You.” 

    Even little sister Dani—played by Thora Birch, now 31, with an impressive set of Yabos of her own—can’t hide her disdain for her brother’s status. “What happened?” “A VIRGIN…lit the candle.” Thackery Binx, that mangy feline, spends his eternal life protecting the candle from “Airhead virgins” yet puts the blame on them when he finally reunites with his ghost sister who wants an explanation for his centuries-long stint eating sewer mice. “Sorry, Emily, I had to wait 300 years for a VIRGIN to light a candle.” It’s a bit contradictory and a weird message to put into a Disney movie, but hey, it was the Nineties. 

     Besides virgin-shaming and multiple attempted child homicides, Hocus Pocus has all the classic Halloween tropes and then some: black cats, cauldrons, spell books, bullies stealing candy (ICE!), jack-o-lanterns on haystacks, a mom in a Madonna costume, THE DEVIL HIMSELF (sort of), even a Zombie! It also ages pretty well--much to Winnie’s delight I’m sure--and is entertaining as ever, as people from the past flung into the strange world of sprinkler systems, firemen, and city buses is never not funny. And I didn’t even get to touch on the majesty of the musical number. It may not be as quotable as Mean Girls, but it is definitely up there on that list, seeing as I find every opportunity to say “Dost thou comprehend?”, “Tis FIRM!”, “Oh, look. Another glorious morning. Makes me SICK!” (reserved for Mondays), and the coup de grace of “AMUK! AMUK AMUK AMUK AMUK!” 

     So, what are your favorite quotes and moments? Let me know on Twitter @a_ferretti25! Hocus Pocus will be on ABCFamily the nights of 10/26 and 10/27. Have a Happy Halloween. Watch out for virgins.


Here's a link to the university's webpage version. http://www.dailycampus.com/focus/nostalgia-101-the-wonders-of-the-90-s-a-bunch-of-hocus-pocus-1.3097284#.UmXNE_l4w_g

Walking Dead Season Two Episode 10 "18 Miles Out"

How can I not make a comparison to Breaking Bad when they give me a title like this? It’s very similar to “4 Days Out”, a phenomenal episode. The structure is thinly similar. The two main guys drive out a ways, have some conversations, problems arise. What was great about this episode was that it was the most self-contained so far. Most of this season has suffered from extremely slow pacing. All the episodes on the farm have be weirdly disjointed yet very connected to each other. Some stuff happens, the episode is over, and the next one picks up where we left off, which was pretty much nowhere special, and some more stuff happens. This time we skip ahead some time, we get 2 stories that have beginnings and endings, and only a small group of the cast is present. It feels right, like a nice little chapter instead of the exceedingly long paragraphs of the episodes before it.

We left off last episode with Lori Lady Macbeth-ing and Rick serious-acting-face-ing. This time we start in media res (that’s the correct term, right?) with Shane and Rick being attacked by some zombies at a school and Fence-Spike-Randall tied up and crawling for a knife. This cold open worked for me, it created a sense of momentum that they’ve been struggling with maintaining.

But before I talk about that story I want to discuss what the ladies are up to. Beth is potentially becoming a character with all the focus she gets this week, but her story is more of a means to get Lori’s, Andrea’s, and Maggie’s opinions about suicide (and to get catty). I have mixed feeling about this whole plot. I liked getting a chance to hear more from Andrea about this, ever since the CDC event, all we’ve seen from her on the topic is snippiness at Dale. I agree with her arguments to, I might not want someone to kill themselves but in the end it’s not my decision to make. And of course it was wonderful to have someone finally call Lori out on her bullshit. “The men can handle this on their own.” “You’re in my face over skipping laundry?”  Lori, the 50’s called, they want their antiquated ideas on gender roles back. That’s not the only annoyance Lori brings to the table. Remember when Carl was shot and she felt it would be better if he just died? That’s her son we’re talking about, and now this girl she barely knows wants to end it and she’s all gimme the knife, life for everybody? I understand Rick changed her mind about Carl, but this didn’t sit well with me.

Meanwhile, in more action heavy portion of the episode (because MEN!), the Rick and Shane conflict finally comes to a head, and by that I mean they hit each other in the face a lot. First, Rick lays it on the table. He tells Shane he knows what he thinks of him, that he doesn’t believe he can protect his wife and kid, he knows about him and Lori and the baby, and too bad, brother, nothing you want to happen is gonna happen. Shane pouts in the car like a reprimanded child while Rick discusses winter survival strategies and how they should be using guns less against the zombies. It was nice to see Rick exhibiting some leadership skills, he’s been slowly stumbling less in regards to being a leader of the group.

Anyways, they almost get rid of Randall until he divulges that he knows Maggie, meaning he possibly knows where the farm’s at, meaning the leg of their plan just got impaled on a fence post. Shane decides to shoot him, Rick stops him, and the manliest kerfuffle begins. Then the zombies wake up when Shane chucks a huge wrench toward Rick. Then awesome zombie kerfuffle begins! A great moment with Rick when he gets buried under a pile of zombies (is this a metaphor?) , Randall cuts himself free, and Shane gets stuck in a bus. It looks like Rick and Randall were gonna leave Shane behind, but of course Rick doesn’t and saves Shane, proving two big things.  1. Rick’s approach to life is better for other people (in this case, Shane, himself) than Shane’s is and 2. Rick is actually a lot better at protecting people than Shane believes/wants to believe. Rick gives Shane a speech that’s essentially a reiteration of the first, they drive home with Shane pouting again. We end this story just like it began. So they had a confrontation. Some feelings came out. They had a nice brawl. Does this solve anything? Nope. But it was super fun to watch, and it gives both of them a little more to think about. Is anything resolved? Nope.

Not yet.

Other thoughts:

-Shane, to Rick: “You can’t just be the good guy and expect to live. Not anymore.” “I’m not the good guy anymore.” Let’s see how true this is.

-Love the POV shots of Randall in the trunk. They need to do fun camera work more often. *coughlikebreakingadcough*

-Rick to Shane, about what to do with Randall:  “He’ll be locked up in the barn. Unless you BUST it open.” Ooooooo too soon?

-that brawl was really awesome. I loved how they slowly started to sound like zombies themselves. Also, how’d that first gunshot not wake up the walkers?

-What’s up with those two dead zombie cops with no bites. Uh oh.

-In the zombie gross-out corner: Them running over the head and squashing it. In the words of Rachel Ray: Yummo!

Walking Dead Season 2 Episode 9 "Triggerfinger"

I have less words to say about this episode and I don’t know why. I didn’t like it less than last weeks. But I don’t think I liked it more. But, don’t get me wrong, it was awesome. The scenes where Rick, Glenn, and Hershel were fighting with a group from Dave and Tony’s crew were as intense as anything. One of the reasons for this being that we’re dealing with enemies with fully functioning brains, and not mindless corpses with horrible skin. Zombies are dangerous enough, but they don’t use either GUNS or INTELLIGENCE. Also, I would be remiss to not mention poor Randall, the kid that got his leg impaled on a fence spike. It fulfilled the necessary amount of violence and gore that we require as bloodthirsty television viewers, and it also can be chalked up as yet another example of Rick being badass and being willing to do what no one else is.

I told Shane to move over last week, and Andrea nicely explains why. It’s not that Shane is making the wrong decisions, because really what he did to Otis, lying to Lori about Rick, wanting to abandon the search for Sophia, and unleashing the barn zombies were all the right call. “It’s [his] presentation that leaves something to be desired,” explains Andrea. “Have you ever considered a lighter touch?” she asks of him. I liked scene a lot. It reestablishes the connection that Shane and Andrea have, what with their being outcasts, having decisions made for them, etc. But of course I still don’t want them to leave. Though that’s something I don’t think I have to worry about happening.

Besides the action in town and that scene, I didn’t really like the rest of the episode. I think it’s because I don’t like any of the characters. Not that I dislike them, it’s just that I barely know enough about most of them to care enough to like them.

That’s why so many conversations seem…arbitrary and scenes seem so disconnected from each other, and that’s why so much of the action is driven by these people being stupid. Okay, not all of them. There’s Rick. He’s the good guy. He wants to do the right thing, and the inner conflict comes out of the fact that “right thing” has shifted drastically far away from what it used to be and what he knows. Then we have Glenn, the Everyman, the kind of a nerdy guy. And I like him because he tries to do the right thing, like Rick, but isn’t always up to his own standards (like tonight when he gets scared and hides because Maggie feels). He’s also very resourceful, and I hope he continues to get more to do. Then there’s Shane, who has a lot of potential as the “crazy, on the edge guy,” but his amount of crazy changes depending on how much the writers needs him to be crazy about in any given episode. And then there’s everyone else, whom I can’t even describe as much as the other three, and I only used two sentences. I mean, Dale was cool, but now all he has is his desire to get Shane kicked out of the group. Lori is whatever negative, unhappy conversation the writers come up with, and her opinions are really whatever the opposite of her scene partner’s (except tonight with Rick, which I’ll get to). Daryl has potential because he’s awesome, but now he’s going crazy. Carol, with her daughter dead, only exists because apparently no one else talks to Daryl anymore. Maggie loves Glenn. T-Dog is black. Ok, there’s Andrea, who I like almost in spite of myself because of those blue eyes. I guess she’s pretty defined too, what with her views about life/death and her journey to becoming strong.

The fact that I barely know anything about these people is made even more annoying by that fact that this show’s writing has them literally stating how they’re feeling. This isn’t a bunch of complaining, this is me trying to flesh out why I’m sometimes having issues with the show. Because the action and the zombie stuff is always top-notch, so it has to be the characters, right? Well, I hope we work on that (can we just kill T-Dog and Carol now? Please? They aren’t necessary at all anymore. T-Dog never was). Besides, I like this show, even though I have problems with it. No show is perfect (except maybe Breaking Bad). I also have faith that it’s going to continue to get better.

Which brings me to that final scene between Lori and Rick. This works extremely well, especially with the look on Rick’s face that we linger on long enough for me to get really uncomfortable and scared. He’s creeping closer and closer to that edge. It’s exciting and chilling. And I love Lori going all Lady Macbeth with Rick; she’s exploiting his need to prove himself to her (and Shane) in order to get rid of a potentially tricky problem before it gets any worse. Granted, her choice of argument here, that Shane doesn’t believe Rick can protect Lori and Carl, works well enough, she adds on to that her and the group’s general fear of Shane. She doesn’t have to add that, but what she could have added was the fact that SHANE TRIED TO RAPE HER. Remember that? Am I the only one who does?? Telling Rick that would get him to do the deed right quick. Do we not because we still have four episodes left to go? Come on Lori, I know your head may be a bit jostled after that car crash, but still.

Other thoughts:
-speaking of that car crash, which was just plain silly, we get our weekly dose of fun zombie stuff. The zombie sticking his head into the hole of the windshield and scraping off his face was grossly awesome.

-The sound editing continues to be one of the best things about this show. The sound of Randall’s leg being ripped up off that spike. *shudders* 

Walking Dead Season 2 Episode 8 “Nebraska”

Naturally, we pick up right where we left off last time, looking down the barrel of Rick’s awesome gun. Now we have to deal with the aftermath of what when down when the barn zombies were unleashes, and Sophia punched us in the gut with her little zombie hands.

Overall, this episode was just…depressing. And I like depressing. But this show already has enough nihilistic undertones in any given episode and this one went a touch overboard with it. EVERYONE’S SAD AND IT’S A TOTAL BUMMER TO WATCH.

Thankfully, we still get good ol’ Walking Dead stupid arguments and unrealistic plot developments. Hershel decides to pick up drinking after 20 some-odd years and never having it be mentioned before. And Beth is, well, Rick puts it best: “in some sort of state.” So Rick, being Rick, decides to go and bring Hershel back. Glenn, being Glenn, decides to tag along. All of a sudden this becomes an issue, mostly because Lori’s there so naturally decisions can’t be made without an argument first. Thankfully Rick shows some development. Because this is not like his selfless search for Merle way back when. He needs Hershel for the sake of Lori and their unborn baby (I hope it’s a girl so I can make more Breaking Bad comparisons). Then we have Maggie, who has clearly been spending too much time with Lori, and so has to argue with Glenn about him going (Geez, the writing for the women on this show…). I don’t understand why Maggie is scared for Glenn to go. It’s a run they’ve made more than once before, easily, and if she’s so nervous for Glenn, shouldn’t she be at least twice as nervous that her father is there by himself?  It feels like a conflict for the sake of conflict. Which is further supported by Lori changing her mind, like, an hour later, going to get Daryl to go to bring them back. And the only reason she goes to get Daryl is so we can see how he’s dealing with the whole Sophia situation. Because Lori decides to go by herself without telling anyone, and manages to get into a car accident without the help of a cell phone. Lori’s character annoys me, because everything she does just makes me so away that I’m watching a television show character, and not an actual person. I might as well get over this, seeing as it most likely won’t change (that is, if she’s still alive, which I’ll have to wait until next episode to see, but come on, she’s totally alive).

Speaking of people I have to get over: Dale I don’t like how he just magically puts together what happened between Shane and Otis, but I do like that it gets to Lori, who has much more of a reason to believe it’s true (remember that time he tried to have sex with her at the CDC?), even though she initially defends him for the purpose of denial.

Back to the good stuff. Rick continues to prove Shane wrong by being able to get stuff done. He manages to convince Hershel to go back home. And of course, just when they get up to leave, Dave and Fat Tony walk in. “Oh hey! New people!” was my reaction, and from Glenn’s face that’s probably what he was thinking too. After some pretty friendly, if not slightly awkward conversation, things start to get a little…off. (And that actor who played Dave did a GREAT job, making that situation change levels of awkwardness, making it become increasingly hostile). Fat Tony pees on a wall, and Dave gets less and less subtle with his conversation. It was very suspenseful throughout, because Dave and Tony aren’t necessarily bad guys, but they’re suspicious, and the audience as well as our heroes are trying to gauge how suspicious. Rick realizes what’s going on and kills them, reinforcing that he’s the guy that can and will get stuff done (Move over Shane, Rick’s becoming quite the badass himself). Let’s just hope those gun shots don’t attract zombies. Or worse. This scene was a nice--or, to our heroes, probably a bleak and unwanted--reminder that zombies aren’t their only danger.

Other thoughts:

-Shane getting angry with Hershel, accusing him of knowing Sophia was in the barn. I believe that Hershel didn’t know, and that Shane is just trying to get some blame off himself for what he did.

-Carl: “He did the right thing: shooting her like that. I would’ve done it too.” AHH CARL STOP GROWING UP SO FAST.

-I’m worried about Daryl….

-Unfortunately, for her, I’m not worried about Carol. I mean, I don’t know anything about her, and now that Sophia’s gone, she really has no purpose.

-I did laugh at Dave calling them “Lame-Brains,” but do we need all these unnecessary terms like Walkers and geeks? What, Zombie isn’t good enough for you people?

This week in zombies: 
-Nice shot of Andrea piercing dead Mamma with a scythe.
-The arm falling off the truck was a nice touch as well.

Walking Dead Season 2 Episode 7 "Pretty Much Dead Already"

The cold open got me really excited. The secrets out the zombies are banging on the doors. We’re gonna have an action heavy episode! Credits roll, and whole middle of the episode was just the same as last week’s. the pot is boiling but not boiled over yet and I thought we’d have to wait another week until the lid finally blows off (I am really committed to this pot on a burner analogy and I have no idea why) But then, the last nine minutes. Oh. My. God. Yes.

But let’s slow my rolls here and talk about the other stuff first. Glenn’s revelation about the barn moves the dynamic between Hershel’s and Rick’s people from somewhat strained to an all-out conflict. And conflict is good. It also brings the series main dichotomy (Rick versus Shane) to the forefront in the most successful way the show has so far. Glenn’s news gets Shane super angry because it gives him something to focus his rage on. ON the other hand, it gives Rick another opportunity to play the diplomat with Doc. Shane is shouting about how they’ve got to “take care of the problem before the problem takes care of [them]” and Rick is getting more and more desperate in his conversations with Doc. You can see that Rick has gotten more and more strained, and his wife’s pregnancy isn’t helping that strain. Rick is getting close to the edge, and while I know he won’t turn into Shane any time soon (or ever), I’m still nervous about what’s gonna happen when he reaches that edge. And speaking of edges, Shane’s confrontation with Dale in the woods serves to bring Shane to the edge of his rope too. (Do ropes have edges? I guess it would be the end of his rope. Rope? Vines. Vines?)

The series is pitting Rick against Shane (now more with (a little) subtlety but eventually it has to lead to a head-on conflict); humanitarian versus brute force survival. Shane’s intensity, which comes across as bad-assness and aggression, is really just a way for him to deny responsibility for his actions. As long as he tells himself there are lines he won’t cross, he can justify his behavior as it being necessity. Conversely, the more lines he does cross, the easier it will be to do whatever it takes to get what he wants. And so for once, Rick’s desperate attempts to hang on to some of the ways of the old world don’t seem quite so sadly misguided and useless. It’s the only way left to avoid becoming a monster. But we aren’t done yet.

This escalates with Shane and the others all having guns. (and notably none of Hershel’s people have any.) And while I, like season3 Gustavo Fring, don’t believe violence to be a positive motivator, an argument can only really go one way when one side has a gun. And if Shane wasn’t angry and hell-bent enough at that point, he turns around to see Rick helping Doc bring two zombies back to the farm. If Shane were a large, sassy, African American woman, this would be the moment where he would say “oh HEEEEELLL no! Somebody hold my earrings.”

Leading to the fantastic final scene (I LOVE shouting) where Shane unleashes the zombies and him, Andrea, T-Dog, Daryl, and Glenn do what they have to do, while Hershel and the others watch as their family and friends get gunned downed mercilessly (though hopefully now Hershel got the message that they aren’t human anymore, thanks to Shane’s demonstration of how bullets affect living people). All goes quiet for almost long enough where you would expect the arguing to ensue again or for the episode to just end. But no. Sophia creeps her way out of the barn. She’s of course a zombie, and probably has been for a while. This is a classic reveal, an unexpected punch in the gut. Besides that, it makes me feel bad for shitting on the writers, because they apparently had this in mind and weren’t just stalling with this Sophia plot for seven episodes. Sophia is the last piece of proof that will shatter Hershel’s delusions of cures. More than that, this shows that Rick’s fervent determination to keep the ways of the old world alive is almost as much of a delusion as Hershel’s. In the old world (our current world, thank God), you look for a missing child for as long as you can. You believe they’re alive, maintain hope, and that hope is considered right and noble. This is something Rick believes, something Shane has been struggling with. But when Little Miss Gut Punch walks out of the barn, Shane is just as frozen as Andrea and everyone else. Fittingly, it’s Rick that does what has to be done.  

Other thoughts:

-some nice stuff between Glenn and Maggie this week. Loved that Glenn manned up and told her that he wasn’t sorry about telling everyone and that he would rather she hate him and be alive than be dead. And that beautiful moment at the barn when Glenn’s about to help shoot the Walkers but first looks at Maggie, and she, with tears in her eyes, nods yes and lets him do what must be done.

-also, loved the cinematography in this episode. It’s been pretty good overall, but I noticed a lot more fun stuff in this ep, like the eyeball-close shot into the crack in the barn, the camera creeping up and over the top of the barn as Shane looks around. Also many of the shots during the final scene had some beautiful angles. I want to make one my wallpaper.

Walking Dead Season 2 Episode 6 "Secrets"

Secrets secrets are no fun unless you share with everyone. I love how Glenn knows the secrets and then he reveals that he’s a bad liar. Because of course he is. Why have the secrets be revealed to someone who isn’t at risk of sharing them? That’s no fun and has less dramatic potential. The drama explodes when secrets are revealed. And while the pot has yet to boil over on the “Zombies in the Barn” burner, Lori’s secrets are finally out (to the person who needs to hear them, of course).

But before that happens, we have to have her be stupid first. It’s not necessarily stupid for her to assume that they’ll be staying at the farm for a long time, so telling Rick isn’t as urgent, but when she does find out that Rick has been keeping this secret she says the stupidest thing ever. “I don’t understand how you could keep something like this from me.” Which is such a stupid thing to say for so many reasons.

Though this pregnancy thing as a whole is an example of how dumb these people are. Everyone who knows that Lori’s pregnant is telling her to keep the baby, and how important it would be to have a baby as a sign of hope and good in a world gone to shit. I disagree with this. Of course, my opinion doesn’t matter. Neither does Dale’s, neither does Glenn’s. Neither does Rick’s really. The only opinion that matters is Lori’s. But, of course she the only anti-pregnancy one, because, classic Lori, she has to have the opposite of the popular opinion in order to create drama (Like with Carl and wanting to learn how to shoot). But that’s not why these people are stupid. She’s not just going to have the baby. She’s going to be pregnant for nine months. She’s gonna be slower, fatter, more vulnerable, more of a weakness to the group as a whole. No one is thinking about this, everyone’s too busy pushing their anti-abortion agendas and waxing romantic about the joy of a baby.

I have my issues with Lori, but I agree with her reasons for not wanting to go through with the pregnancy. But other stuff happens this episode too, so enough about her stupid unborn baby.

Glenn knows about the zombies in the barn and now Dale does too, because cut the bullshit and spit it out Glenn. “You’re old. Er..you’re…you know things.” Too bad Maggie’s bucket of peaches and jerky didn’t work to keep him quiet for long. I can’t wait for everyone to find out, because shit is gonna hit the fan and it better be glorious.

I mentioned how I didn’t like how Dale handled the Lori situation, but luckily his discussion with Hershel was better. The main conflict here is the different definitions that our group and Hershel’s have for the Walkers. I love the hope and faith Hershel has; the commitment to his family members, which makes this all the more difficult. He believes they’re sick, comparing them to paranoid schizophrenics, and waiting it out for a cure.  But our group isn’t sheltered like the people on the farm; our group knows of the harsh realities of this zombie predicament. They aren’t humans anymore, there isn’t nor will there ever be a cure, and they are too dangerous to be left alive. The plot development stops there, but, like I said, I’m sure next week shit is gonna go down and things will take a turn.

Also, Andrea gets trigger happy and feels the power that comes with murdering undead abominations. That energy, on top of her emotion-heavy advanced gun training lesson with Shane, releases itself in with a sex sesh in the car on the way back to the farm. And I could only be happier if the camera stayed there longer and showed how wonderfully angry and tension-relieving it was. Of course they didn’t have to, because when they get back to camp both Andrea and Shane try so little to hide it that Lonely Island’s “I Just Had Sex” could be heard coming out of their ears.

Which leads to another unfortunate Dale development, where he’s all distrustful of Shane now. I understand that he saw Shane point that gun at Rick way back when, but I feel like it’s a leap too far for Dale “sensing” that Shane is lying about Otis, no matter how upset he is with Shane for plowing Andrea. It doesn’t matter that his suspicions are right, it’s lazy writing for him to have said suspicious without sufficient evidence. Also, Dale, you don’t want to mess with Shane. You just don’t. 

Walking Dead Season 2 Episode 5 "Chupacabra"

I’m glad it’s looking like we’ll be picking up the momentum next episode, what with the zombies in the barn and all. It seems every episode I change my mind about how I want the pacing to be, but I think I’ve decided I’m okay with one or two lower episodes, but we can’t be having long stretches of no progress. Well, I can’t even call it “no progress,” because there isn’t really any central goal right now. Yes, yes, that’s kinda the point of the show. But I need some things to be moving forward. Five episodes Sophia’s been lost. Only really Rick and Daryl care at this point, I don’t even think Carol cares all that much anymore. She’s not even real anymore. She’s just this…idea now, used to create storylines like having Daryl go search some more and having Rick and Shane debate about the cores of their personalities.

Also, so many people are dumb. Let’s go one at a time. Glenn, my dear buddy Glenn. He gets the cold shoulder from Maggie and starts pouting like a child. Then he goes to talk to Lori about her pregnancy for God-knows-why, she obviously doesn’t want to discuss it. So then he goes to Dale and starts asking if everyone is on their period. Really. You think Maggie doesn’t want to fuck you again because she’s PMS-ing? That’s a strange level of arrogance coming out of you Glenn. Plus, you know Lori is pregnant, she doesn’t have to worry about her time of the month anymore. And then he just pulls Andrea into the mix too, because why not? Andrea is just bitchy; it has nothing to do with her menstruation.  Stupid Glenn. And you were so good last week.

Maggie is also pretty dumb this week. Telling her dad he doesn’t have to treat her like she’s 16, and then turns around and starts passing notes at the kids’ table about a coital rendezvous spot. That’s not the dumbest part though. She asks him where they want to do it. Even she freakin’ lives there and knows the area better. And there’s that barn full of zombies she doesn’t want anyone knowing about. Maybe she should’ve set up the meeting place. Don’t just make someone do something stupid for the sake of drama.

Oh yeah, Andrea shoots Daryl. Which is stupid. Not because she couldn’t tell it was him, I mean, he looked like shit and was walking like a zombie. What was stupid of her was that she shot when Rick and the gang were super close to Daryl. She’s not a good shot (as we see when she, thank God, only grazes Daryl) and even if it was a zombie, she might have shot one of the non zombies. Dumb.

I agree with Doc. I wouldn’t want these people hanging around me place much longer either. Making dumb decisions, taking my horses without asking. Also I want them to get off the farm and have some things happen to them. I liked Daryl’s scenes (EXCEPT GODDAMN IMAGINARY MERLE GODDAMMIT) because nothing that happened to him was due to him making a stupid mistake. Too much of what happened this episode was because someone did something stupid. Of course, this might all be intentional fodder that will be used to bolster Doc’s desire to get them to leave. But I want these people to be put into situations because of the circumstances they are living in and not because they’re making mistakes.

Other thoughts:

-Another flashback cold open. Showing the military destroying Atlanta and Lori/Shane/the gang watching. Seems completely unnecessary to me. Didn't provide anything for the rest of the episode. Just random. 

-So Daryl was actually wearing sleeves this episode because he had a premonition that he would need to rip them off from bandaging purposes later.

-Rick, becoming self-aware, thanks to Shane and that Dairy Queen waitress. “My good intentions are making us weaker that I can’t make the hard decisions for the good of the group. Maybe I’m holding on to a way of thinking that doesn’t make sense anymore.” This means progress and character development? Or does this just mean that now that Rick knows what he’s like, he can really roll up his sleeves and commit to it? There’s slightly more drama in the latter option, but it’s in the category of frustrating drama.

-"It's a wonder you people have survived this long." Honestly though.